birth of cecilia


Written in mums words

cecilia was my first baby and i went on a hypnobirthing course because i wanted to know what was happening to my body in labour and how i could help things. i had grand plans about going into spontaneous labour and having a water birth – but cecilia had other plans!

At 39 weeks my waters broke. it wasnt like you see on the movies, i actually just thought i had wet myself a little as there was so little fluid. nothing else happened so i assumed it was nothing and carried on with life. 3 days later the same thing happened so i phoned my husband on his way home from work and we decided to go into the hospital to get checked.

the midwife checked to see if my waters had broken and sure enough they had. this meant that they had actually broken on friday though and it was now Monday night. due to the risk of infection to baby given the amount of time that had elapsed since my waters had broken and my labour had showed no signs of starting, i agreed to be induced. we went home to get our things and have some food and agreed to go back in to hospital at 10pm for the induction.

i was really nervous about being induced but my husband gave me a talking to and i put on my scripts whilst i ate my dinner. i listened to them all the way back into hospital.

once there they gave me the pessary of gel to start the induction. the consultant came in to me and said ‘what pain relief are you having’. i said ‘i’ve given my birth preferences to the midwife but ideally i don’t want any, i’d like to see how i get on’. the consultant, a tall middle aged man (im 5ft 2), looked me in the eye and laughed and said ‘you’re having an induction, you’ll be needing an epidural’ and then walked out of the room.

i felt so insignificant and like there was absolutely no way i could do this, he saw women do this all the time, he must know better than me and i had a panic. again, my husband gave me a talking to, we put the scripts back on and tried to get some sleep.

i woke at 5.30 with some period type pains. at which point the midwife decided it was time for the drip to go in to stimulate my contractions.

my labour was not at all as i had planned – i was induced and that took it’s toll on my body and cecilia’s meaning they used a ventouse to help get her out at the end because her heart rate had dipped. there were a lot of people in the room, and i had to have an episiotomy to faciliate the ventouse.

she was born at 6.30pm that night weighing 7lb 5oz. 

but you know what, despite all of that, i felt absolutely amazing about my birth!

i didn’t have the epidural that i didn’t want, in fact i managed to go the duration of labour without feeling like i needed to ask for any pharmaceutical pain relief – i just used my scripts, i tried my best to move about, i had my battery operated candles going despite being on the obstetric unit and i played by scripts for the duration of labour (i’m sure my midwives and husband were ready to pull their own ears off after listening to it for so long!), but it’s what kept me going.

for every contraction i just kept thinking ‘every contraction is one closer to me having our daughter in my arms and this being over’. i was completely calm despite everything going on around me and i just focused on my breathing. i was in my own little world and barely noticed anyone else except my husband (who was invaluable) and the most amazing student midwife who would take over looking after me when my husband had to run for a toilet break or grab a drink. 

i felt like superwoman after i gave birth despite what on paper could seem like a negative experience. can you use hypnobirthing with an induction? absolutely! in fact, i really don’t think i could have done it without it. it is not about how you give birth (by induction, spontaneously, vaginally, cesarean etc.), it is about how you feel about it.

it left me feeling empowered and like i could take on the world.

becci – first time mum